My world's been kind of crazy lately but the one thing that's always been there has been my faith. My faith in life, my faith in love, my faith in trust and honor, but mostly my faith in God. I'd like to think that he's the reason I've gotten as far as I have. That he's the one that has taught me all the lessons that I've learned in life. My morals are strong and even though it doesn't happen 100% of the time I expect to be treated the way I treat others. I don't understand how people can be so cold towards other people having no regard for their feelings and be able to hurt them and not feel guilty.
And I'm not just speaking of my life and the cards I've been dealt lately but just society and people as a whole. So many ugly people in the world that it sickens me at the thought of even leaving my house, keeping me captive in my bubble. When I was younger I never realized how cold the world really was because my blinders were 12 inches thick. But after my bout with death my blinders fell off and I was able to see the world so much clearer and I hated it. I hated all of it. I had to remind myself that I was one of God's children and I needed to act and feel how he would want me to. I had to forgive but I didn't have to forget. So that's what I'm dealing with at the moment.. To not just forgive others but to forgive myself. And I know only then is when I'll be able to heal.
And I'm not just speaking of my life and the cards I've been dealt lately but just society and people as a whole. So many ugly people in the world that it sickens me at the thought of even leaving my house, keeping me captive in my bubble. When I was younger I never realized how cold the world really was because my blinders were 12 inches thick. But after my bout with death my blinders fell off and I was able to see the world so much clearer and I hated it. I hated all of it. I had to remind myself that I was one of God's children and I needed to act and feel how he would want me to. I had to forgive but I didn't have to forget. So that's what I'm dealing with at the moment.. To not just forgive others but to forgive myself. And I know only then is when I'll be able to heal.