So I have a confession to make, I'm not as I seem. Now don't get me wrong, I'm much different from how I was once on the outside but on the inside, sometimes I'm crying. Screaming at myself, at God, for the choices that I've made. And the things I've put myself through, things I allowed myself to go through. Yes it's made me so much stronger, but not without consequences. I'm a shell of myself and what I should be. I can't for the life of me figure out what God must think of me. Doing good for so many, yet not for the ones that matter the most. They say there is a reason for everything, so what's mine? Is my mental deterioration my karma for the choices I've made? Most definitely. Every action has a reaction and this misery is mine. The other day someone spoke of my three loves and referred to them as "Riches kids" I lost it. It was then that I made the decision, I'm going home.